We are all made up of past selves - ghosts that either haunt us or hold our hand as we walk forward into the next set of memories. Some we love and are proud of and some we want to trim out and pretend they aren’t part of our stories. It’s a balancing act that I will be practicing for the rest of my life - loving and letting go of deep hurts and

We are all made up of past selves - ghosts that either haunt us or hold our hand as we walk forward into the next set of memories. Some we love and are proud of and some we want to trim out and pretend they aren’t part of our stories. It’s a balancing act that I will be practicing for the rest of my life - loving and letting go of deep hurts and fears. Ghosts always carry these dark connotations. And those nebulous imprints of memories and events can definitely weigh on a person for a long, long time. It takes a lot of courage to stop trying to shore up every little crack to keep them out and instead open the door, reach out a hand, and let the story shift and settle so that it can be carried in a different way. There is so much “new” information to process every day and sometimes it feels easier to pretend that a past story only lives there - in the past. I’ve learned for myself that those stories can become particularly chatty in the present too when I don’t give them the air time they need. Cold Wind is a journey from allowing ghosts to hold me apart from others to integrating everything that makes me who I am and leaning into love.

Cold Wind is a journey that will never end. A balancing act between living in the present and safely reabsorbing and processing past events, memories, and moments that are stuck and leave both stagnancy and panic. Warming musically from beginning to end, Cold Wind is a reminder that change and integration can happen. Steel guitar from Past collaborator Roger Gustafsson compliments slow and thoughtful cello from GRAMMY nominated Dave Eggar and breathing guitar from GRAMMY nominated Phil Faconti.

6 years ago I had a chance to continue my soccer career for a season after finishing my university eligibility (go Razorbacks!) on a Swedish island in the Baltic Sea called Gotland. It’s a very beautiful place and I enjoyed so much having the chance to be there and meet new folks and learn to love soccer again. At the same time I was really quite

6 years ago I had a chance to continue my soccer career for a season after finishing my university eligibility (go Razorbacks!) on a Swedish island in the Baltic Sea called Gotland. It’s a very beautiful place and I enjoyed so much having the chance to be there and meet new folks and learn to love soccer again. At the same time I was really quite homesick and I struggled with the dichotomy of feeling really lonely and sad while I was having this incredible, once-in-a-lifetime experience of playing semi-pro soccer abroad. I felt so guilty because often the narrative in our world is “you should be so happy” in whatever experience or place you are in - especially if it is something like getting to live and play a sport abroad. In a lot of ways I was really lucky to know that my family was going to have a chance to come visit and that my then-partner-now-spouse was also going to have a chance to visit. I was counting down the days!! The chorus of the song bubbled out first (I was going to travel to the mainland to meet Jonathan in Stockholm and then travel back to the island with him) and I was really hesitant with it because I thought “well it’s totally silly to put Swedish in one of my songs - I barely know ANY Swedish.” After a while I allowed myself to lean into it and the feelings of distance and time separating me from the homey and familiar feeling of being wrapped in my best friend’s arms and accepted playing with the language. Even though the song has a longing and melancholy note and feel to it, it became a really sweet and amazing memory of my individual experience there and also our time there together. I’ve since gotten a bit better at Swedish and have enjoyed learning more of the language over time. In the chorus of the song there are two simple phrases - jag älskar dig means “I love you” and kommer du is a question: “are you coming?” So you get a song and a Swedish lesson :)